mumbo jumbo

Well this is probably just gonna be a bunch of mumbo-jumbo since there are quite a few things on my mind lately it seems.
1. The fact that Rexburg is getting colder. What the heck? Fall is meant to last longer than a month for goodness sakes! Yeah I’m from a place where it rains like 9 months out of the whole year (nonstop) but fall still is extremely pretty in Hillsboro, Oregon. With all the gorgeous colors on the trees: bright red, rich brown, firery orange, and sunny yellow. The air is especially crisp because of the rain that falls often. But when it isn’t raining, the sky is bright blue and the sun is shinning. But here in grand ol’ Rexburg, this happy time only lasts for barely any time at all and then the snow is falling and the air is so freezing that without proper protection, you very well could die while walking to class. Yaaay. I’m so excited!
2. Boys are stupid.
3. Seeing good friends of mine go through hard things makes me really sad, because I feel their pain. I am an extremely empathetic person and therefore, what they feel, I feel. Well, at least some of it. I don’t think I could possibly ever understand exactly what they are going through, but I know that I can at least relate. And most of the time I feel the need to help them, but a lot of the times don’t know how and just have to hope that me being there for them will make a difference in their trial.
4. I really need to stop eating candy. My plan to be healthier is not really working out right now…haha…
5. I must already be having a bad week because all I want to do is sleep. And that isn’t always good (and I know it) because it means I’m in a bad mood or sick or cold or just plain too tired of being around people. Sleep is like my drug/addiction. I tend to overdose on it sometimes without even really realizing it.
6. Turning 19 is very un-monumental or exciting or life changing. I feel no different at all. Now if I were a guy, I’d most likely feel different because then I could go on a mission but nope I gotta wait two more years. But at least I can submit my papers in a year and a half, and I suppose that really isn’t any time at all.
7. Which brings me to the thought I’ve been having lately that time seems to be going by very very slowly yet awfully fast. And I don’t know which one I’d rather it be.

Sorry to be all lame and depressed and no fun and not positive like i usually try to be. its just a weird week. But of course it can always get better, not worse. :)

keep on keeping on

so, right now all i care about is keeping on! things have still been rough: in the last two weeks i've been to the doctor like 5 times and got my blood drawn twice!!!!!! but i just found out today that my results came back normal so thats a relief. today i took a 4 hour nap or something and woke up way surprised that i slept that long.

and right now i'm watching history as the chilean miners who have been underground for 3 months get rescued. its amazing that they've lived that long, with eating a tiny piece of bread and a sip of milk every day. so far 3 have been rescued. it simply is a miracle! and their strength gives me strength! if they can survive for three months underground, i can survive another week of college, with food to eat (even if its the classic ramen) computers to use, bed to sleep in, and friends to help me. :)

also, watching this rescue and the reporters covering it reminds me why my career that i'm working towards is so important to me. i want so badly to be there, letting the world know what is happening by the minute and using the story and experience to inspire people.

anyways, i had the blessing of going to utah not this weekend but the one before for conference! i wasn't actually able to go inside the conference center when i was in salt lake sunday because i didn't have a ticket but that was okay with me because i got to watch the sunday afternoon session with cal who i haven't seen in months in the joseph smith memorial building :)
but most of all i was happy to see mis padres and my mormor! they picked me up from my twin's melanie's apartment in provo saturday and we spent the day in provo together and had lunch with my cousins christer and karl and karl's cute wife socorro! i also got to see haleeeey badaley!!! i've missed her. we walked around university mall together saturday night with every other lds woman and their dog since priesthood session was going on.

conference was great and i learned so much. i also appreciate President Packer and his talk. he is completely right. our Heavenly Father would never make someone be born with something that goes against his laws, especially since He loves us. the Church also released a response to the HRC petition.

"The Church’s doctrine is based on love. We believe that our purpose in life is to learn, grow and develop, and that God’s unreserved love enables each of us to reach our potential. None of us is limited by our feelings or inclinations. Ultimately, we are free to act for ourselves."

i really like this quote.

here are some pictaaaas from conference!

mels and i! i heart my sister.

my mama!!! at the reflection pool temple square

cal and i :)

my minolta! i got some great shots of the temple and developed one for my photo class and i'm pretty proud of it. i'll eventually scan it and upload it here.

anyways i'm gonna go make some toast or something so peace out! and keep on keeping on! :)

faith

I did this for my free choice journal entry in my english class, and realized that it is pretty much my testimony. So I felt like sharing it and remembering it. (I also posted it on facebook hehe)


What is faith? In primary I was always taught that faith was like a little seed and if planted it will grow. In young women’s I was taught that “Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true.” - Alma 32:21

And it means so much more to me now. I have learned through my experiences so far in life that faith is drastically more important to me than I might have thought before. When I look back on what has happened to me, two completely different things enter my mind: that those things were extremely hard, but yet that there are many other people, even people that I know, that have been through worse. I like to think that my gratitude for the things I have been through is because of my faith in my Heavenly Father.

However, sometimes I feel inadequate to have faith. When a challenge is really hard to face, sometimes the faith needed to overcome that challenge is even harder to come to terms with. I worry that I do not have enough faith to go through it.

But, as I have recently realized, I will never be inadequate of faith. It is not something that I need to deserve in order to have. If I plant my faith firmly, it will grow, even if it seems like there is not enough sunlight for that little seed to sprout. Yes, it isn’t easy. Yes, even my very testimony in my loving Savior Jesus Christ will be threatened with challenges that need faith. Faith that knowing the sun will rise and brighten each new day. Faith knowing that I will be able to get up every morning.

When I again look back, I also realize that maybe my faith has been more than adequate. So far I have been able to get through challenges and I’m still breathing. At the same time, I have been incredibly blessed with many miracles. And I truly believe that this is because of my faith in Christ. I think that every time I tell myself that everything will be okay I am saying a prayer to my Father in Heaven asking him to bless me with faith. I wouldn’t be able to ask for faith and receive it if I didn’t have faith that He would give it to me. Faith, no matter how much or how little, I will always have.

blessings!

okay so the seven week break was long but good, and now there has been like three weeks of fall semester! survival rule #12: count your blessings.

so even though i've been enjoying this semster, its been a bit hard at times. for instance, pretty much NOBODY has gotten their loans yet, including me....even though that kinda has to do with the fact that my mom and i didn't complete the fasfa for this year quick enough...but still. so i have no money. and a computer that sucks. BUT. i know i say this a lot but you really gotta count your blessins. so i try :)

so here is a list of exciting things that have already happened/are soon to happen so far this semester!

1. my roommates are fantastic (heres a couple of our roommate pics! chyaa i took them again hehe...i rock)

2. i'm busy. which can sometimes be a bad thing. but its good.

3. i'm workin on my health

4. i'm learning how to shoot with film!!

5. i feel like i'm surrounded by amazing people with amazing testimonies (especially in my ward)

6. my teachers are way bomb. and unique. more on this later :)

7. i'm in utah at the moment visitng my twin and i get to go to conference!! and see mis padres!

8. life is good

9. the weather is freaking rad at the moment...warm!

10. its almost my birthday :)

yeah so i'd say i've got some pretty great blessings. and the Lord loves me! i realize this more and more each and every day.

and oh, i caught our kitchen on fire. :)